Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Who Does That -- Part IV

The following is a paraphrased conversation between myself (henceforth known as "Me"), my boss (henceforth known as "Boss Man") and a co-worker from another department (henceforth known as "Blame Everyone But Myself Man").


Telephone rings ...

Me: This is Dana, how may I help you?

Blame Everyone But Myself Man: (Very irritated voice) Dana, you did not give me the report you were supposed to have completed for me two days ago.

Me: I handed you that report three days ago. Are you sure you didn't misplace it?

Blame Everyone But Myself Man: (Even more irritated voice) That report is absolutely vital and it is highly unacceptable that you would neglect to submit it.

Me: I'm sorry for the confusion, but I distinctly remember handing you that report at a meeting in my boss' office, as you stressed over and over that you needed it ASAP. I rushed to complete it because, as usual, you waited until the absolute last minute to request it.

Blame Everyone But Myself Man: (Still with a very irritated voice) I have looked all over my office and it is not here. This is simply inexcusable! You are a terrible employee!

... Slams telephone




Boss Man: Dana, Blame Everyone But Myself Man called me and threw a hissy fit because you are not meeting deadlines and failed to give him that report he needed two days ago.

Me: I handed him that report three days ago when we were having that last meeting in your office.

Boss Man: Don't worry, I know that. I reminded him that he was supplied with that report in that meeting, and that three other people witnessed him take it from you. They also witnessed him thank you, over and over, for getting that done for him and then shoving it inside a folder crammed full of other papers.

Me: I tried to remind him of that, but he just raised his voice with me even more.

Boss Man: He tried that with me, too. I told him there was no need for that, with me or my staff members, and that he should go look in his office again. I also reminded him that there was no reason to freak out, as Dana always keeps a backup of her reports.

Me: Thank you, Boss Man.




Telephone Rings ...

Me: This is Dana, how may I help you?

Blame Everyone But Myself Man: Yeah, I found that report. It was under a big stack of papers. Okay, bye.

... Hangs up telephone before I can say anything.


Who Does That?

3 comments:

BrewCards said...

I had to run my repsonse through the profanity filter.

Easy answer: A doing the wild thing rooster vacumner!!

Nothing pisses me off more than a Cubhead that can't keep his solid waste together and has to blame someone else.

Deb said...

What a Richard. Obviously, he needs to be beaten about the head and neck.

Cardinal70 said...

Man, you read about those guys in Dilbert, but you don't expect them to exist in real life....